Hello All!
Sorry about my sabbatical again. I am a horrible secret keeper, and since we were swiftly approaching the date where I was planning on putting in my 2 weeks notice, I avoided my blog a bit.
How lovely it is to be talking to you all. My resignation took many by surprise, but ultimately, despite how much I loved my job, it was the right decision for me. And because I am a big fat chicken, and the world’s worst quitter, I booked myself a two week vacation over my birthday, coincidentally, it was also over inventory, so no matter what I had to quit or lose out on about the $700 flight+car rental I put down. I chose the trip. Hello from my three and a half hour layover in O’Hare International Airport, Chicago.
You see, Americans have it all wrong. You need to work to live, not live to work. What do I mean by this? I would like to share a conversation with you all that I had with a mom who was on the metro in Prague.
I see this little girl dressed to the nines. I feel like a stupid American, but I look at the Mom and ask, “Hey, do you speak English…?” “Yes,” she responded. So I say to her, “sorry I do not know your language, but can you tell your daughter that she is dressed very nicely.” The mom and I start to talk, her daughter is on her way to a concert to play her clarinet. So I say, “Oh, I love the clarinet, I played through some of university.” The mother looks at me, and asks, “But you no longer play???” I respond, “Well, no, I haven’t played in a couple years.” She asks, “Why not?” I scramble for words, but they do not come. The sad look on her face just hits me hard. Why don’t I pick up my clarinet anymore?
Well, why not? Because in today’s world, in the United States, we favor the almighty dollar. We prioritize work, so much so, that we forget to live. This conversation hit me hard. It made me think. It made me sad. I love playing clarinet, but in the hustle and bustle of my life, spending 50 random hours a week at work (not a set schedule) wiped me out. I had no time for friends, for family, or for the things I am passionate about.
I was reminded of this conversation this past spring, when I had the privilege to attend my university symphonic wind ensemble professor’s retirement party. This conversation came rushing back to me. It poked at me in my sides like a dagger. “Carolyn, why don’t you play your clarinet? Well Carolyn??? What are you doing with your life? What was the last thing you did to help give joy back to your community?” I don’t know. Let me repeat that: I DO NOT KNOW. What an unacceptable answer.
You see, I do not mind putting in long hours at work, but I think you all have seen a picture of my schedule. It is chaos. I showed my schedule once to a friend, and they said, “Ha ha, this is not really your schedule, this is not legal, show me your real schedule.” It was my real schedule and it was and still is LEGAL. Not knowing what you work more than two weeks in a advance and it could be a late shift followed by an early shift, or have your days off separated. It never really gave me time to breathe. Unless I was on vacation.
So now I am on a nice two week vacation. I joke about how I will be spending all of it on a beach, but I really could never be that ‘lazy.’ So I’ll be taking day trips to other states, and helping one of my best friends move. But it will still be a fun and relaxing trip. Until the point that it hits me like a sack of rocks that I no longer have an income. lol.
But I am looking forward to this short break. Ready to rejuvenate my heart, body, and soul, then immerse myself in some human resource work. Hoping to work 40-50 hours a week, Monday-Friday, in Human Resources or project management somewhere. Then when all my finances work themselves out, and I feel comfortable, go back to school part-time for my masters in either, you guessed it, Human Resources or project management.
Life is exciting when you believe in yourself and the beauty of your dreams.
Until Next Time,
Carolynski Marie
Avid Traveller
Carolynski Marie 